Ashley Jamesのインスタグラム(ashleylouisejames) - 7月10日 04時07分

In my happiest chapter as a family of 4. 🩷

I don't know about you guys, but I always used to be someone that would think I would be happy WHEN I got this or achieved that or met someone etc. Happiness felt dependent on something happening in the future WHEN those things were in place.

A few years ago during lockdown, I did a course with a happiness coach. It sounds a bit fluffy but hear me out: she studied the science of happiness at Berkeley University. She told me all these facts that actually have stuck with me.

She's called @stephpeltier_happiness and I actually recorded a podcast episode with her so you just have a listen for some hugely interesting facts and advice. Some that will also seriously help alleviate mum guilt too (like the 10 minute a day rule!).

But anyway, a few things that always stuck with me (and I hope I'm correct here) were that the happiest people on the planet are Tibetan monks. When they studied their brains, they noticed their left prefrontal cortex was bigger than the average person, and therefore they could experience greater joy.

Interestingly, monks don't have material possessions nor any of the other things we think we need to be happy: a house, a romantic partner, a career etc. And actually according to science, all of those things - promotions, marriage, cars, houses etc - do make us happier, but only 10% happier and only for a short period of time. That's why usually as soon as we get them we're chasing the next thing.

But the good news is we can all be much happier for longer through mindfulness and gratitude. Again, this isn't fluff it's science! Listen to the podcast!

And it's interesting isn't it, because being happy isn't about everything being perfect. As we know, life ebbs and flows - things will always happen. But it's about learning to ride the wave. About living in the moment and appreciating what you do have, rather than what you don't. About not being resentful or bitter for things that have happened. About forgiving yourself.

Anyway, this chapter is fast becoming my happiest. And actually the most joy I get is in the little things. In seeing the world through my babies innocent eyes. 🤸‍♀️✨❤️

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